GREENTH

I suppose in the end, the whole of life becomes an act of LETTING GO, 

but what always hurts the most is not taking a moment to say GOODBYE. ~Life of Pi

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taking sometime starring at my room
thinking am I really leaving “you” this soon.
my altar, my photos(our photos), or simply just this greenth
but as my heart honestly speak it’s phrases to survive.. I cant really move on if I’m not going to move out first.
this greenth walls had given me so much
      or maybe enough.
some yearnings, happiness, dreams,
those overnight tears and unconscious cuddling.
and if I may say this place has been a transformation nest to me,
it taught me to “grow up”, be strong, take a risk
      and even ..surrender.
there are nights when it reminds me to consider my own
      and take a little pride by tomorrow.
and if tomorrow never comes, I could almost say this place will never lost any details of my memoires for
      this is exactly who I was before
        and who I had become

every reflections spells my name clearly as it is
this is where I always say my last words
all my praises and glorifies to my lord
my renewal of faith has always been born every sun rise in this greenth
the tears that the night helps me to weep.
and finally, the inevitable strength that it furnished..
the strength to almost say it has come to “goodbye”.

THE STORY OF US

“ I always thought you were the BEST

I guess I'll always WILL."

It’s sad how it ended before I knew it. One day we were best friends and the next time i see, we’re merely two people rooming together. I remember how you were the scrawny freshman in the university who wore that huge clothing. 'You remember when I was the struggling yuppy who was enthusiast about getting a career and having it my own way and you supported it though. Before then we would indulge in each other’s company because you were that young brother I never had and I was the most loyal friend you’d ever find. One day we cant stop talking, I cant stop laughing, but the next thing I notice, I’m more of a sideshow than a main show. We walk in silence, live in silence, and have distrust between us. Can you remember when was the last time we talk  about "us"? Oh clearly we are OVER but the sad part is that I don’t really remember when it ended. All I know now is that it's time to LET YOU GO. Yes, I never leave you — I let you go instead. And it pains a lot knowing that if I turned my back from that very night on the park where we used to dream of visiting together there could never be another HELLO for the two of us. I loved you man and I know we’re both moving on to bigger and better things, but damn, I know I was silly contented on just being with you and just having you around me in those years that gone by.

"I finished crying in the instant that you left & I can't remember where or when or  how & I banished every memory you and I had ever made"

Even though everything had ended, I didn’t regret it. I never regretted it, not for one second. All the nitty gritty of our story, the promises, surprises, failure, acceptance, our strong faith, those weaving of dreams and that countless "starting all over again" yes. picking up where we left or whether we fell off our feet and all sort of silliness and simply that bumming inside our room the entire day. Everything means a lot in every ways that you will never know.

How do you regret one of the best days of your life?   
You don’t.   
You remember every word, every look, every inch of those moments. 
Even when it hurts,
you still remember.

"And now, the STORY of US Looks like a TRAGEDY Now."

The END.